My Advent…my letter to a BAD Santa!


 

 

Dear Santa,

I have a problem. A big problem and I wonder if you can help me.

I am trying to write a Christmas ghost story, to be posted on here. Only it is reading like something a ten-year old would/ could write.

This was my idea and if I don’t come up with something, I will look like an even bigger numpty than I usually do.

I don’t have a clue…please could you bring me a clue…before Christmas Eve.

I’ll leave you some sherry and mince pies. .

Love Dorne x

 

Photo credit: randombuzz.com
Photo credit: randombuzz.com

Dear Dorne

Firstly:

  • Hasn’t anyone ever told you that I don’t actually exist.
  • You can’t blackmail me with sherry and mince pies.
  • I don’t fly my imaginary sleigh under the influence, unlike you, who blogs…under the influence!
  • But yes,  I have been listening at your fake chimney stack.

Secondly:

  • Try reading any one of those million books, that you have on your Kindle.
  • You know, the ones that actually explain how to write fiction.
  • Decent stuff, instead of the mind numbing nonsense, that you churn out on here.

Last, but not least:

  • Give your readers a bit of fun this Christmas.
  • Publish your story.
  • Spread a bit of uncontrollable laughter this Christmas, as your followers read your pathetic attempts.
  • At the very least it will make them grateful for not being you!
  • Existing in your strange little world.
  • That is about to become even weirder!

Love Santa. x

P.S.

I’ll be watching you tonight, as you sleep. That strange, blacker than black shadow that passes over the wall, in the middle of the night, as you awake from a terrifying  nightmare, will be me. Hah, hah, hah!

 

There will be a story on here, of some kind on Christmas Eve. I have no idea what…but it will come to me; or not!

Thanks for stopping by and enjoy the rest of your day.

Until the next weird time.

 

 

2 comments

Go on...make my day/life and leave a comment. I don't bite...much!

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