I want to like, wash my bottom on the sofa in the lounge and then I may have another little snooze. Before you’re sick ,mummy has a big fluffy throw on there and a waterproof cover: and so my bottom will not make the sofa smell. Which is a shame, because I love all things smelly and fluffy. Cool!
She can’t do anything about my
farts smells though. They are like something else. They’re awesome! Sometimes I have to run away from them. I mean where do they come from? Well, alright I know where they come from… but, I mean what have I been eating? Like! They’re so GROSS!
I’ve been living in this place like since January and it’s like okay.
I will be five in May of next year. Yeah, because I was like four in May of this year… get it?
I like to be cuddled and I love to get myself comfy on the sofa and screw the covers up. Sometimes I drag the covers off the sofa and dump them at the bottom of the stairs like. That’s awesome.
If dad leaves his empty coffee cup on the coffee table I like to get in there and have a slurp of it. Yummy. Yeah, that’s awesome – me… a teenage greyhound on caffeine. You’ve got to see it to believe it. Heard from downstairs, me in the bedroom sounds like an earthquake… cool – like!
Why is the coffee table called a coffee table like? Like does it need to have coffee all over it? I can help with that!
This thing called Christmas is coming like and mummy has put things called decorations up in the house… the whole house. Daddy says it’s too cluttered and mummy tells him it’s Christmas and to shut up – like. Later on I find daddy looking at the decorations and smiling. When mummy ( who is also known as she who is usually obeyed) asks daddy to put the lights up outside, at the front of the cottage ( because we have to emphasize we live in a cottage – like) he can’t get out there fast enough – like! This has nothing to do with mummy – she is trying to get her chocolate – filled bottom through the loft hatch, to find more Christmas decorations. Daddy may never get back in again. The decorations may fill the house – like.
Anyhow – like. I’ve discovered something called crackers. Mummy had carefully selected some to go with the rest of the rubbish she has on display – like. I got hold of one the other afternoon and showed it to daddy. He told she who is usually obeyed and she took the cracker away and then she moved the other crackers.
She’s forgetting that if I stand on my hind legs – like, I’m nearly six-foot tall… hah, hah! I could get the crackers – like.
Right, I’m bored now – like. I need to sleep a bit more, but I might come back again sometime – like.
If you’ve read this… cool! If not… I’m not really that bothered – like.
Big sloppy kisses and a right awful pong from The Daisy Dog x
A middle-aged woman going on about this and that!
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